Break (your) rules

Sometimes we create rules for ourselves that used to serve a purpose but now could be holding us back.

In 2011, or there abouts, I had a major break down. It was related to many things but probably the combination of becoming a parent for the first time and having (what felt to me at the time)  a very stressful and highly accountable job didn’t help. I may have written about this on here before. I may not have done, I’ve no idea because I tend not to re read posts. Anyway, as part of my recovery, I took up photography because I wanted something beyond work that I could use to unwind that was just for me.

In the intervening years I have grown and taught myself to become a competent photographer, good enough to be approached by publishers, taken seriously by professional photographers and other creatives and good enough not to embarrass myself when I photographed a friend’s wedding as a gift.

Wedding day (30 of 110)

L and A’s Wedding

Where our rules come from

However, I don’t think I’ve ever posted one of my own photographs on this blog (until now). There are three reasons.

  1. I was a perfectionist Initially, I probably didn’t think they were good enough.
  2. I didn’t want to mix my professional persona with my personal persona. This blog was/is mostly leadership and professional things but photography was personal for me.
  3. I didn’t want a reason to procrastinate. Adding a photograph to a post was just another thing to do that would stop me writing and publishing.

These were useful rules for a time but I realised they are holding me back. They are stopping me being creative. What rules have you set up in your life that are now getting in the way?

Questioning our rules 

Good enough by whose standards? Perfectionism is the enemy. Having to be perfect  stops us doing things. It stops me using my photographs it stops you speaking out in meetings in case  you look silly. It stops us both trying something new in case it fails.

Don’t worry about being perfect. Do the best job you can do and put it out there then refine and improve with time.

The personal is the professional. If you work with people, which most of us in schools do, then your professional approach is informed by who you are as a person and what you do or think personally. I used to be ashamed of talking about depression or similar then I realised that actually it made me more human and many others could relate.

Share your love of fly fishing or whatever with your class or team, it’s the personal connections that make us want to work hard for others.

I’ve learnt that actually, for me, procrastination is fear in disguise. I’m actually a fairly driven person. When I procrastinate it’s for one of two reasons. I either don’t really want to do the thing, or more usually, I’m scared. I don’t entirely know how to do something, it’s new to me and I don’t want to get it wrong. When I start new things I’ve not done before I always take a while to get going. I don’t know where to start and I don’t want to fail.

When you keep putting something off that you know you actually want to do ask yourself “What am I afraid of?” Then go find somebody who has done it before, get some advice and get started. 

Always evolve

When I first heard of Facebook, maybe in 2007 or something, I couldn’t really see the point of it. My partner was really into Myspace (if you are under 35 you won’t know what I’m talking about) and then she got in Facebook and persuaded me to get on it. I started using it a great deal until our kids were born and I made a conscious decision not to post (m)any pictures of them because it felt too public. So since 2011 ish  I’ve barely used it. I only check it when friends or family  tell me there is some group thing  they’ve put on there.

At work I used to be more along the “no excuses” mode with kids but now I feel I’ve mellowed a bit. I once led a department where I wanted to get rid of all text books now I just think teachers need space to do what works for them and helps their classes learn.

It’s ok to change your mind, along as you can explain why.  In fact, I now feel that a rigid sticking to ideas is the hallmark of a closed mind. Things change, why should you believe everything you did as a child, as a fresh graduate, as a new leader? People need to evolve and that might involve making mistakes or changing our views. So what?

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Bedtime project

We do not need to be hamsters on our own self-imposed wheels.

I don’t know how to end this post. I just know that I want to write it. I want somebody who needs to read it and hear the message today to see it and act. To do something or stop doing something in order to improve. Maybe that somebody is you. Let me know what you did(n’t).

Publish.

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What do the last 5 things you purchased say about your priorities?

It’s easy to spend money randomly and without thinking. How well do your recent purchases reflect what you consider to be important?

My last 5 purchases

I recently came across a blog post somewhere asking readers to consider their last 5 purchases. At the time of reading* my last 5 things were…

  • x1 photobook on Blurb of 30ish  photographs I’d taken. This marks the end of a long term personal creative project- charting our journey through IVF fertility treatment and birth of our twin daughters
  • x1 commissioned work of art for our landing from an artist I came across via Facebook
  • x1 photo journal which features the 40 snapshots from my iPhone’s camera reel which I feel best represent my 2016. A visual kind of visual review of the year.
  • x1  present for my mum
  • X1 2017 calendar featuring photos that I’d taken of our kids throughout the previous year

That was a few days ago…

Now my last 5 purchases immediately prior to writing this post are (most recent first)

  • x2  bottles of jojoba oil (for my hair and skin)
  • x1  Mean Girls DVD
  • x1 chicken shish kebab
  • x1 rail ticket into London

How does our spending match what we say we care about?

What do each of those say about me? Do they even say the same thing? People fixate a lot on money. I see it as a tool not an end to itself.

An interesting exercise is to consider how well the above purchases correspond to the words that I currently** use to guide my personal and professional life.

Integrity. Relationships. Curiosity. Fun

Now it’s your turn

  • What do your last 5 purchases say about you?
  • How well do they reflect what you feel is important?
  • Do you know what your next 5 purchases will be?

I’m interested to hear your thoughts. Send me an email on ismall1408@gmail.com or tweet me at @ieshasmall

*I think I originally read and wrote this at the start of 2017. I found it today in my drafts and thought I should publish it. 

** These are now Integrity. Relationships. Growth. Fun. Abundance.

Are we only as good as our titles?

What brings us worth at work? Is it all about titles? What can we do when we know we need a change? 766 words

At the start of this academic year I’d pretty much decided that I wanted to leave teaching. There were things I liked about my job but I was also frustrated. Each job I’d done was to have more impact. I was now an Assistant Head and facing the fact that maybe education couldn’t do what I’d idealistically thought when I started as a bright eyed and bushy tailed as a new recruit to the Teach First scheme in 2004.

Had I become part of the problem?

Was I really in the place where I could make the biggest difference possible for the bits of society I wanted to?

The past academic year has seen many ups and downs. I’ve felt stuck personally and professionally. I’ve been confused and despondent. I’ve been self critical and asked people I respect to help me reflect and reassess things.  I’ve also grown immensely and discovered that I have, do and can continue to make a difference. In ways that were unexpected in September 2015 but still as important.

I’ve finally seen the fruit of some of my behind the scenes work with middle managers and students in my own school. I’ve had leaders from other schools that I’ve worked with talk to me about the impact I’ve had on them and their teams and I’ve discovered that I’m a person whose writing and speaking can touch particular people, especially those in leadership positions and spur them to real and important action.

After being somewhat at sea and realising that a promotion and new school weren’t going to solve whatever my issues were- I started to think about what else could be done. Then I started to try and make things happen. This unexpectedly lead to a wonderful opportunity  for me and  I had really honest conversation with my boss. As a result we came to a solution that would have been unimaginable for me back in September.  I’ll be working for 2 days at my current school in the maths department (maths teachers are always needed) and will be working for 3 days with LMKco helping other organisations to tackling social disadvantage in a different way. It seems like my mission is the same but the way I’m tackling it is different.

So the title thing? I’ve been in middle or senior leadership positions since my 4th year of teaching. I was clearing my office ready for my own move but also because the school’s into a brand new building. I’ve never really cared about titles but they matter to other people. You can see people reassessing you as a youngish woman when they ask what you do and you say you are a senior manager.  I like the freedom and autonomy + potential impact on a much wider range of people that senior leadership in a school can bring even if I can do without some of the other bits.

I know I’m doing the right thing for me. I knew that as soon as I made the decision and it was all finalised a few months ago.  I don’t think that I’ve mentioned to my Nan and Mum yet that I’ve decided to step down from SLT. Have a let them down? People always talk to me about what a good Head I’d make but I’ve decided to go in a completely different direction.

I’ll still be me, with the same knowledge and experience. I’ll still write about leadership here and in my book because I feel that effective leadership can impact such a wide range of people and people tell me that I have interesting things to say. It seems that I’ll still have the opportunity to work with leaders within and beyond education, which is exciting.

I’ll enjoy my new teaching role working at the same school with children I’ve built relationships with and it won’t do me any harm at all to experience leadership from the other side again for a while.  I look forward to taking on a new challenge with my new team in my other job.

It doesn’t stop things being scary though. The unknown is often scary.

If you are reading this and thinking of making a big change or leap into the unknown- don’t discount things. My decision hasn’t been easy, it’s had real practical implications on my family life. We’ll have to change how we live but it will be worth it.

Consider what really matters to you, personally and professionally and remember that titles are just that. They don’t measure your worth.

 

What do our fathers teach us about leadership?

In the UK it’s Fathers’ day today. For many of us, our fathers are the first model of leadership that we have – what do we learn from them subconsciously? (630 words) 

Today is Fathers’ day.  My Dad’s birthday is in the same week and some years ago we decided that we wouldn’t officially celebrate Fathers’ day. He doesn’t expect a separate card or presents from me but it’s always a time to reflect and I usually give him a ring.

It occurred to me this morning that, for me and many other people, my Dad is possibly the first real model of leadership that I ever experienced, even if it was subconscious.

My Dad was and an excellent Dad to a young child. From him I learnt dependability and stability. I remember him once being made redundant and taking a job that he was massively over qualified for in order to ensure that his family were provided for, I never once heard him complain about it. He knew his responsibilities as a husband and father and did what had to be done. He was and is a man of his word if he said he would be somewhere or do something then he always followed through.  He was a fair, calm and considered presence throughout my childhood. Even as an adult I ask him for measured and objective advice about particular things as I value his opinion despite our different perspectives on life.

I have always been a Daddy’s girl but as an older teenager and young adult in my 20s our relationship shifted. My Dad is a product of his generation and upbringing. He is quiet and stoic like his father before him and like many men aged 55+ of Caribbean heritage. Actions are his thing. Feelings, or the expression of them, not so much. The mood swings and exploding hormones of a teenage girl and my earlier difficulties as a young adult were something beyond his sphere of reference and increasingly I learnt that factual things were best to talk about with him but feelings not so much.

I wonder how many other of us have subconsciously taken on the leadership model of our parents?  For many years I considered feelings to be a private thing and the expression of them to be a weakness. Not from others so much- I didn’t really mind that- but from myself. My general approach in life and at work was just to get on with things and if things weren’t going so well to keep on getting on with things and not admit to vulnerability. This worked for a time and it’s not always appropriate to express or share everything in a professional context but actually there is a danger with this approach. Eventually, with some very big life events, I realised that I could’t always keep things to my self.

Now, I have learnt that a healthier model for me is to express feelings (to appropriate people) as well as more factual things. In leadership and life I have found that people appreciate my intellect and analysing of the facts but actually it’s my passion about things that really draws them and and persuades them. In recent years, quite surprisingly to me, my honesty and vulnerability about mistakes and professional and personal conflicts that I have experienced has also been an asset- leading to new and deeper relationships and interesting professional opportunities.

But what about my Dad? Well, this week I had quite possibly the most surprising conversation with him of recent years. What started off as a quick birthday call ended up as a wide ranging discussion about trust, intimacy and our own quirks and mistakes in relationships with our spouses. This was all interpersed with the general laughter and mickey-taking that is a constant feature of our relationship.   It seems that sometimes opening ourselves up allows others to do the same.

 

 

How can managers get the best out of employees with mental health issues?

Tips for employers to support staff with mental health issues so they can do their best work. This post is in support of mental health awareness week. (680 words)

Create a workplace ethos of safety

I have had major periods of depression since I was in my late teens. Generally, when considered over medium to long term it hasn’t affected my overall academic achievement or outcomes at work. I didn’t feel safe disclosing my depression at work until I was in my 30s. Working in an environment where I could tell that staff were valued made all the difference.  My boss was open minded and non-judgmental and we had built a good rapport. I knew she respected my work and didn’t expect things to be perfect. Mistakes were acknowledged but not excessively penalised as the had been in other places I’d worked. This created a place of safety where I felt able to mention – at a time when I was feeling fine- that I sometimes had major depressive episodes but would be able to continue working through them and most people wouldn’t notice.

Listen to what they tell you- not what you think they need

If somebody feels comfortable enough to tell you about their mental health, just listen. Don’t come with any pre conceived notions of what you feel may be useful to them. They are adults and they will tell you. Everybody is different and what works for some people may not work for others.

Ask what they need to be able to do the job to the best of their ability when not 100%

For some people it could be ensuring that a colleague popping in just to say hello during a difficult classes. For others it might be communicating via email for a few days rather than face to face. For others it could just be having the space to mention to a boss or somebody on their team that they having a bad period.

Alongside this – some colleagues may feel overwhelmed during periods of mental ill health. Help them by making it clear which  1 or 2 aspects of their role that they need to focus on at that particular time. Reassure them that the other aspects can wait until they  are closer to their best.

Ask if there are any preventative measures that can be implemented

For me having an office with a window makes a huge difference. I also have a special light that I use during the winter. This helps immensely.

Don’t assume everything is a result of their mental health issue

Sometimes people are just quiet. Sometimes people are tired. Sometimes people are just sad.  Not everything is a result of somebodies anxiety or depression. It can be annoying if people assume that .

Treat them like everybody else

People with mental health issues can do their jobs as effectively as everybody else when they are self a

ware, well prepared and adequately supported (personally and professionally). Aside from some of the hints above, managers need to be aware of the genral motivations and strengths and interests of all their staff.

Be honest about your own vulnerabilities

Maybe you secretly don’t understand how to use a spreadsheet. Perhaps you’ve always found it hard teaching Year 9 history at the end of the day. Appropriately letting staff know that you aren’t infallible will make them feel better about discussing something that is intensely personal and still attracts stigma.

And finally

This goes without saying, but alongside any other personal issues related to staff of sensitive nature- confidentiality if important. Nobody wants to bare their soul then have it repeated back to them by Rob at the photocopier by lunchtime. If you need to tell other people for organisational reasons, let the staff member know beforehand.

Schools are fast moving and pressurised environments. Lets support our staff and make sure they feel safe enough to have a conversation about mental health.

What about if you are a manager or leader with mental health issues? Should you keep it to yourself? That will be the subject of my next blog post.

 

 

 

 

 

The importance of hope

Why hope is important? How can we foster hope in others and ourselves?(89 words)

Hope is essential to the human spirit. Hope can turn a bad day into a good one. It doesn’t need to be much,

A small seed.

A kernel.

A dot on the horizon.

Hope is the belief that change is possible.

That now isn’t forever.

That there is a chance that the future will be different. Better.

Hope gives a reason to get up in the morning. To live. To work. To love. To try again. To wait.

Hope gives meaning. Hope is life.

 

How to rescue a rubbish day

Sometimes we can get overwhelmed by events. At times like this, acknowledging the good in others can help (365 words)

A couple of months ago, I went for an interview for a job. I didn’t get it. I was hugely disappointed. I’d like to tell you that I thought, ‘Oh well, their loss,’ but I didn’t. Temporarily, I descended into a pit of despair and thought about how I’d never be able to get to where knew I could be. I disappeared to bed and wallowed.

After an hour or so, I got over myself. For over a year now, before I go to bed, I’ve been writing down three things every day that I’m grateful for in any aspect of my life. It’s quite illuminating and it’s amazing how much doing that can change your perspective.

So I decided to stop concentrating on my disappointment and say thank you to a few people in my life. I had a couple of cards that I had bought for specific friends which I’d not yet sent, so I wrote those and sent them. Then I sent an entirely cheesy text to my cousin telling him how proud I was of him for a few things that he’s done recently and how much he inspired me. This was an unusual act, we usually talk about the stock market, business and creativity. Interestingly, within about 10 mins I got a lovely and entirely unexpected text back from him thanking me and saying how proud he was of me for a few specific things too.

After about an hour, I felt much better. Job? What job? They didn’t deserve me. I had great people in my life and there would be other opportunities.

At work, I keep a pack of ‘Thank You’ cards in my drawer. I hand write them occasionally and randomly to let colleagues, know I’ve noticed them and valued a specific thing that they have done. It’s 2 mins well spent and always turns around a bad day.

So next time you are having a bad day, register it, acknowledge it and move on. Then focus on other people for a bit and see what happens.

A question of values

Recently a friend handed in her notice with no job to go to. One of my closest friends did something similar two years ago.  Both had recently been promoted at a new school. A few years ago I was signed off work having had a breakdown and made the decision that I would never work in that school again whether I had secured a job or not. I, too, was set to hand my notice in. At that point we had a mortgage and a toddler and could not have met our commitments as a family without my salary.

Luckily, I found a new job and started a different phase of my life but what makes a person get to that point?

Recently, I attended an excellent workshop run by David McQueen – Success on Your Own Terms. I’m at a bit of a crossroads with some of my creative work outside of school and wanted to refocus.

At one point David asked us to list our top three values, with no filter and without overthinking.

Mine were

  • Integrity
  • Curiosity
  • Love/family
  • Development

Ok so that’s four, but you get the idea.

Then he asked us to list the top three values of the organisations that we work for.  There was some laughter in the room.  A few people struggled because they weren’t too sure what those were. A telling question from the floor was, “Do you mean what we say they are or what they actually are in practice?”

So what makes a person hand in their notice for a job that they have fought hard to get with no immediately obvious means to support themselves and their dependants? Values. It was becoming clear my values did not match the day to day values of my organisation, as evidenced by what I was asked to do and how my manager interacted with me, and it was seriously affecting my health and happiness.

What are your top three values?

Do they match the day-to-day practice of the organisation that you currently work for?

If not, what steps can you take to bridge the gulf?

Illustration copyright of  Robert Price

Copyright of Robert Price

My 2012 (Nurture 1213)

There has been a hashtag going around among education professionals on Twitter called #nurture1213.

The idea is a reflection of 2012 via 12 positive points and plans for 2013 via 13 points that you wish to work on.

Like all fashionable people, I’m slightly late to the party but my reflections re 2012 are below.

1. Photography

I took up photography  as a way to unwind after a particularly difficult 2011.  What started as an excuse to relax and have something just for myself not allied to work, or my personal relationships, has grown into a serious hobby and passion. It has given me a new way to look at the world and enabled me to connect with people who I would not other wise have met.  It is not an exaggeration to say that photography has kept me sane.

2. Kindness of strangers ( social networking)

I was initially underwhelmed by Twitter after being introduced to it via my  real life friend @Dewbien. However, I now believe that, used effectively, it is an unrivalled resource for connecting with people who share similar interests. My account mostly links to educational professionals and photography enthusiasts.  I have been the recipient of the most generous hospitality from ppl all around the world some of whom I have been lucky enough to physically as well as virtually.

As a result of social networking sites (mainly Twitter but to a lesser extent Facebook and Instagram) I have been taken to lunch and invited into people’s homes. I have been offered advice and expertise personally and professionally.  I have been given free software and plugins to help me with my photography.  I have been given insider’s tours of New York, Hong Kong and Sydney – all out of people’s good will.

3. Travel
I have always been excited by travel and been lucky enough to go to some interesting places but 2012 has been a definite highlight for me.  Having never been especially bothered about visiting  Australia, I spent 2 weeks there ( one in Melbourne and the other in Sydney) staying with my best friend who had decided to live and work there for a year after being made redundant.  Since I was travelling alone and I didn’t know that  I’d be visiting that part of the world again I decided to do a stop off in Hong Kong for a few days where I was looked after by the wonderful Nevin @gxgarnerings.  Who I’d been virtually introduced to by  a fellow photography blogger that I knew from London. Nevin, prevented me from being ripped off, introduced me to the most amazing fishballs and let me play with his Leica! For no reason other than that he is a great guy.

Part way through the year. I changed a planned solo trip to Peru  ( which I decided I was doing for the wrong reasons) into a combined anniversary present and first ever  foreign family holiday to New York with M and our (then 1 year old) boy, Little  G. It was brilliant and the feeling that I got watching Little G count and point to every single yellow taxi going by our hotel window over looking Central Park is something that I can’t quite describe.

As if that wasn’t enough I also went to Bruges ( or Brugge)  for a few days during the summer. I’d try to outline the reasons why here but I don’t know. It really was done completely on a whim. Something to do with a Twitter #ff that I idly checked out where I came across @phototourbrugge read the website  decided to go after  I realised that Eurostar went there for not very much and the journey was pretty quick.  What can I say? I’m sometimes a bit impulsive but M is used to it and very understanding.

4. Trying new things. Not being held back by fear.
I’m usually open to new experiences but I’ve accelerated that a fair amount in 2012. I remember  having a conversation with M where I told her that I didn’t want to be held back from doing things because of fear.  You’ll notice from above that I did some of my travelling solo. That is a new thing for me. I’ve been abroad alone before but usually to stay with somebody I already know as I did in Australia. This year was the first time that I’ve gone abroad and stayed alone. It was scary but I’m glad I did it. I learnt that I could and had fun but I also learnt that I love my family and have a limit beyond which I start to miss them terribly – which has ramifications for other things that we have discussed for the future.

However I also eliminated fear in small things. I have good friends and family but I also have very eclectic taste in music and sometimes nobody else wants to come with me. In the past M usually joined me but changes in our personal circumstances mean we don’t go out as a couple as often as we used to. So I decided that rather than miss out, I’d still go if it was something I wanted to see enough. I’m glad that I did.

5. Parenthood

I have now been a parent for just over 2 years. I’m going to be honest here and say that I found it incredibly difficult for the first year and  although I have always loved Little G,  there are a variety of reasons that I initially  didn’t cope very well with the impact of become a parent on my/our life, especially compared to M or other people we know.  That all changed in 2012. I now love being a mum.   There are so many more positives than negatives and I am enjoying helping Little G grow up into a happy, caring and joyous young person (I could do without the tantrums of the terrible 2s though). I hope that by our actions as parents wegive him the gift of happiness and resilience in 2013 and beyond.

6. Work life balance

As mentioned in point 1, I had a pretty crappy 2011 and at the end of it I decided to make quite a few changes to my life and personal relationships. One change was securing  a new job which I started in Jan 2012. When I started that job I decided that nothing would come before my family and personal well being. I decided that I would restrict my working hours to particular times and not work in the weekends. I have broadly stuck to this to no detriment to my productivity at work. In some ways I am more effective than I have ever been.

7. Happy at work
I work at a place where I feel valued and respected, I have thrived and achieved great things individually and via my team because I am trusted and given the space to use my professional opinion to do a good job.  I can be myself but have also been challenged and supported to become a better leader too. I originally joined in a sideways move but promoted to  a year long secondment to SLT this September, in which I am learning a great deal.  I could easily write a nurture 1213 post solely concentrated on work but won’t due to point 6.

8. Life with M
M and I have been together for over a decade. We have had lots of fun together  and some more trying times too.  2012 was the year that we have started to honestly negotiate and conquer what it means to be a couple who also happen to be parents. Our number one duty is to be there for our boy but we have also ( after a few false starts) found a way to remember and nourish  each other too as well as  ourselves individually. There has been much laughter in our house this year and writing this post is making me reflect on just how much I have to be greatful for.

9. Strong friendships
I feel that the modern world places too much emphasis on romantic love and that we expect too much from our  spouses.  The weight of expectation is a massive strain to place on one person. I came to the realisation a while ago that I actually have 2 soul mates, one is M and the other is my best friend, G,  and they fulfil different but complementary functions.  When  G went on a working visa to Australia, I was happy for him and didn’t give it much thought as a year goes pretty quickly. I was unprepared for what came next. I felt as if my arm had been cut off. I was bereft . Here was a person that I communicated with on an almost daily basis for several years and he was now gone. To make matters worse he originally didn’t have a permanent address or mobile phone, this added to the time delay, meant communication during the early months was extremely sporadic.  We managed to make things work and as mentioned in point 3 I visited him during his stay. He is back now but has decided to return permanently as he loved he quality if life ( I can’t blame him). We still have an enduring love for each other but I don’t feel that gut-wrenching dread now because I know that we will be just fine.

10. Honesty
I’m a fairly straight forward person who tries to be honest with people and values those who are honest with me.  I some areas that is easy but it can be difficult to be honest with your self especially if it involves perceived vulnerability or weakness.  I’ve been better at that this in 2012, I have many strengths but acknowledging my limits and knowing when I need to access support or advice has been liberating and improved my relationships and general well being.

11. Live sport
I have a list of things that I haven’t done but would like to try before I die. Some are big but others are small. I’m indifferent towards football but decided that it was kind of sad to be English but never have been to see our national game.  Luckily I have a few football mad close friends so it was not hard to remedy the situation  ( M would rather pull her eyes out). My first ever football match was  England v  Holland. Little did I know that it would be the start of a year of live sport for me and that I would actually like it!

Highlights have been a rugby final, baseball game, world cycling championships, Aussie rules football game, and the Olympics and Paralympics which I  was lucky enough to attend courtesy of a sports- mad and extremely generous friend.

I’m still underwhelmed by almost everything other than athletics on TV but live sport is a completely different experience and I’m planning to see  more in 2013.

12. Puckishness
I can be extremely driven and focused, I turn this on and off and have found it useful in achieving and exceeding my  personal and professional goals. However, deep down inside I’m just a mischievous imp. My life so far and those around me has taught me that life is what you make it. It’s too short to waste being unhappy, regretful , guilty or making others miserable, it is  to be enjoyed – for me this involves regularly  unleashing my ( sometimes close to the knuckle) sense of humour.

2012 has had it’s tough times but overall it has  been successful in many ways as well as being a year of wit, sarcasm, innuendo, harmless flirting and lots of fun at home, work and in between.